How nice would it be if we were never given evaluations at our workplaces, right? Sometimes the word ‘feedback’ is enough to send shivers down our spines, but sooner or later everybody gets some. But what if we change the approach? Because getting and giving feedback is not always the easiest thing, but surely a great and free way to improve given we want to improve our skills, products or even companies.
Let’s face it a poorly delivered feedback can make someone lose motivation unless that person knows better than that. Still it can create thoughts that revolve around the feeling of “lack” like “I’m not good enough”, “I’m not understood”, “even if I tried my hardest and worked a lot, it’s not enough…why even try? I will never get there”, and the list goes on and on.
On the other hand it is really hard to give feedback because we are all biased at a certain level these are based on our thoughts that create our reality, but I will write about it later. Giving feedback is an essential skill we can polish all the time, because if it is done well then both parties will become more motivated to do an even better job.
“Life is 10% what happens to you and 90% how you react to it.” – Charles Rozell Swindoll
When can the feedback-asking-skill come handy? Whenever we wa want to improve, cooing, promotion at work, painting or even in our spiritual practice.
How to ask for feedback?
Be specific. Don’t ask in general or the conversation can go off topic and we might get an answer we would never wanted to know about. Previously for example I had never dared to raise the questions regarding feedback, but nowadays it became a habit. I simply want to know.
Let’s imagine we have different products and we want to improve them:
- Can you tell me which ones do you like the least? Why?
- Which ones do you like the most? Why?
- What do you think how could I make the best products even better?
I got inspired by Héctor Garcia and Francesc Miralles’ self help book called Ikigai, but these are my personal questions, because:
- It is way better to get through the negative things, nobody likes if his/her work gets criticized.
- Then ask about the positive things, we all need confirmation and with this the negative perspective doesn’t seem so horrible anymore. 🙂 Besides it can a lot if our critics tell us what are the aspects they like in the chosen products, so we can improve the others accordingly.
- And the third question is for future improvement, so we can stay ahead in the always changing market.
If we are asked then giving feedback also requires some skills, but we can use the same questions when we share our views on some else’s skills or job. Of course if we provide feedback with love and keeping in mind that we do this only to help, being careful not to let our ego shine too much, it is not about how great we are, but how we can help.